I've thought about this for a while, but just this week I haven't been able to get the idea out of my mind. I am a daughter of an alcoholic (DOA). I believe it has had a huge impact on the person I am today and the challenges I have dealt with in my life. Lots of bloggers have had confessions of sorts about their "secrets" or "truths" and this is mine. I am writing so that others will know they aren't alone and so that I can get it out and document where I have come from. It's something that effected my entire family and in which my father was not completely to blame. And so I am going to start the DOA Diaries. A biweekly/monthly series- whichever I can fit in with life as a teacher! It will cover dark topics and won't be all that cheerful, but it's reality and what so many other people are going through in silence and shame and fear.
Let's start with the poem that got my brain turning and started this whole idea.
FOOD. MUSIC. MEMORY.
She says: Cupcakes. Brownies. Pies. She says:
Remember this. Bread. Stew. Sauce. She says:
All that time. She says: singing. All I taught
you. She says: Crayon. Alligator. Boy Scouts.
She says: Baseball. Soccer. Track. She says:
I was there. Remember?
I say: Shouting. Silence. Shouting. I say:
Remember this. Scotch. Vodka. Kahlua. I say:
Cupcake. Meatloaf. Sauce. I say: Singing. All
you would not tell me. I say: Crayon. Dancing.
Guitar. I say: Belt. Hairbrush. Hand. I say:
I was there. Remember?
Susan Marie Scavo
Susan Marie Scavo is a Certified Archetypal Therapist and Teacher of Teacher of Archetypal dreamwork. To hear her read several of her poems visithttp://www.northofeden.com/videos/susan-marie-scavo-reads-poetry
Take from the blog: http://barbarashoup.blogspot.com/2009/01/poetry-friday-food-music-memory.html
Here's my version, inspired by the above poem.
She says: Christmas. Dinner. Sunday breakfasts.
She says: Remember. Fishing. Long drives. Mushroom hunting.
She says: Our baby girl.
She says: Plaid shirts. School programs. All I did for you.
She says: Playdoh. Movies. Candy.
She says: Volleyball. Your first job. Cars.
She says: I was there. Remember?
I say: Yelling. Hitting. Crying.
I say: Alcohol. Pot. Beer.
I say: Fishing. Mushroom hunting. Feeding ducks.
I say: The baby you always wanted. The life you forced us to live.
I say: Drawings. Art. Stories.
I say: Tears. Hyperventilating. Begging.
I say: I was there. Do YOU remember?
There's a quote written on the chalkboard in my hallway: "We tend to seek happiness, when happiness is actually a choice." ...
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